HEART CIRCLE

ATTENDEES: Please plan to arrive at 6:45pm to grab a drink, say hello and settle for a 7pm sharp start time. No arrivals after 7pm, please. To respect and hold the container, we won't admit late-comers. If you're new; there’s never any need to bring anything. You're always welcome to bring a friend; just let us know when you RSVP. The circle will close at 8pm.

HOST YOUR OWN: Anyone is welcome and encouraged to use the following description and process design to host your own Heart Circles in your community! Attribution to Scott Perret is appreciated. Contact me for a short list of set-up suggestions for your circle container and info on the membership and organizing model we’ve been working with..

Heart Circle is a space to slow down and Be, with others.

In a one-hour small-group gathering every other week, we practice presence, attentive listening to our own Beings, and giving the gift of deep listening to one another. It is simple, easy, and at the end of the hour, participants report feeling renewed, grounded and connected.

You are welcome exactly as you are. You don't have to show up in any special way. You don't have to speak, but you can if and when your heart wants to. Confidentiality is one of our principles: what is shared stays in the room.

the purpose is practice

The more skillful we become at the following three practices, the more we foster the shift towards a paradigm of interconnection in ourselves, others and the world. The purpose of Heart Circle is to slow down for an hour and practice these skills (see Foundational Assumptions for why).

  1. Being Present to ourselves, others, and what is;

  2. Listening Deeply without needing to comment, judge or fix; and

  3. Speaking Authentically from what is true now.

WHY: OUR foundational assumptions

The current dominant paradigm in our society is Separation (thanks to our heritage of mechanistic, reductionist, linear thinking). This foundational paradigm is damaging people and the world. It is also an inaccurate model of reality, unless you’re talking about machines.*

In fact, all living beings and the ‘bio-geo-chemical systems’ on our planet are profoundly interconnected and interdependent.

Fostering a paradigm and lived experience of this interconnection is both a more accurate description of reality, and an important antidote to the paradigm of separation, leading to a better world.

Heart Circle is one way we can practice with intention, gaining skill even as we gain lived experience of being aware of, and in, interconnection, in real time.

what we do - process

We’ve found the ideal number of participants for a 1-hour circle is 3 to 8.

  1. We arrive 10-15 minutes before the circle begins, to greet, get a cup of tea and settle.

  2. Starting the circle: the host briefly reminds us all of the Container Principles we follow for the next hour (see below).

  3. We meditate for 5 minutes to ground, arrive more fully, get present and drop down out of our heads into our hearts.

  4. After meditation, each participant is welcome to pick a tea light (candle) from the center and light it silently for whatever they wish.

  5. We then have the remainder of the hour to simply sit together, and practice sustaining Presence. We silently tune in to whatever is so, in this moment. There is no program, agenda or forced topic.

  6. When something arises that wants to be spoken, a participant can choose a talking piece and share aloud (practice: speaking authentically). The rest of us practice deep listening during this time, giving the speaker our full, neutral attention. There is no advice or fixing.

  7. Between shares, we sit in silence. We all practice continual presence, throughout.

  8. The time-keeper will signal the end of the hour. We briefly share a round of gratitude, blow out our candles, and close the circle.

  9. Afterwards, those who need to leave, may. Those who wish to linger for up to 30 minutes more are welcome to stay for “snack chat”—informal chat time together, often with snacks!

THE CONTAINER PRINCIPLES WE WORK WITH

  1. Be present, now. We are here to practice deep presence with ourselves and one another. Drop down out of your head and into your heart. When you notice you have lapsed into distraction, return to presence; return to your heart.

    1. If and when you feel called to share, use a talking piece and speak with intention, practicing lean expression.

    2. When another is speaking, practice deep listening, without the need to judge or affirm. Be a ‘field of listening’ for the speaker to speak into. This is a profound gift.

  2. Silent soaking is okay. We don’t need to fill the time with speech.

  3. No advice, fixing or cross-talk.

  4. Keep confidential: share the learning, not the person’s story. Or ask permission later.

  5. Keep the container. Once circle begins, the room is closed. Those who are here are committed to staying in our seats for the hour. New arrivals do not enter during this time.

  6. Speakers: be mindful of allowing time for others, within the container of the hour.

  7. For Zoom Gatherings: we do not mute ourselves, but remain present to one another with sound and cameras on for the full hour. This means attendees arrange the space where they are ahead of time, to ensure a calm and quiet container, just as if they were hosting the circle in person at their location.

*For more on what we mean by ‘paradigm of separation’ and the assertion that this paradigm is responsible for harm in living systems from humans to all other areas of our planetary ecologies, reach out for a conversation!